One size fits all at the one stop shop

When we are forced to grapple with the hydra of a government department, we are assured that it won’t be so bad because we can go to a one-stop shop.  This is a good thing, presumably.  No more traipsing from one bureaucracy to another, telling our pathetic little tale over and over again to a succession of nameless public servants.

But what won’t we get at the one-stop shop?  Why, one-size-fits-all. One-size-fits-all is a bad thing, presumably.  It flaps around you, engulfing you in one-sizeness and, truth be told, fits nobody.  Oh, no- we’re all special and different, and no one-size-fits-all for us!!

Personally, I am quite fond of the one-size-fits-all.  Being a woman-of-a-certain-age, and a woman-of-a-certain-size, it’s quite a relief to think that I, too, can wear the same one-size-fits-all outfit as a young gel should I wish so to do.  No  more struggling into fitting rooms bearing an armful of the same garment in an optimistic size 14, a grudging size 16 and a depressing size 18. Why no!  One-size-fits-all! If it doesn’t fit, sweetie, bad luck!

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